Thinking traps: a cognitive distortions card game

Each card has the trap, two everyday examples and a line to try instead.

1. 01

   All or nothing thinking

   Also called black and white thinking

   Seeing only two boxes, perfect or failed, with nothing in between.

   • I missed one workout, so the whole week is ruined.
   • If the talk is not perfect, I bombed.

   Try instead Look for the middle. What went partly right?

2. 02

   Overgeneralization

   Treating one bad moment as a rule for everything.

   • My date cancelled. Nobody ever wants to see me.
   • I burned the rice again. I can't cook anything.

   Try instead Swap always and never for what happened this time.

3. 03

   Mental filter

   Also called selective abstraction

   Picking out one bad detail and looking only at that.

   • My review was good, but one line said to speak up more. I keep rereading it.
   • Lots of kind replies, one rude one, and the rude one is all I think about.

   Try instead Zoom out. What does the whole picture look like, good parts included?

4. 04

   Discounting the positive

   Also called disqualifying the positive

   Good things happen, but somehow they never count.

   • She only said she liked my cooking to be nice.
   • I passed, but the test was easy.

   Try instead Let the good thing count as much as a bad one would.

5. 05

   Mind reading

   Being sure you know what someone thinks, without asking them.

   • He looked at his phone while I talked. He thinks I'm boring.
   • My boss replied with one word. She's annoyed with me.

   Try instead What else could it mean? Could you ask?

6. 06

   Fortune telling

   Predicting that things will go badly, then treating the guess as a fact.

   • I'll freeze in the interview, so why apply.
   • This headache will ruin the whole trip.

   Try instead What happened the other times you made this guess?

   People tend to expect bad feelings to last longer than they really do. Gilbert and colleagues, 1998

7. 07

   Catastrophizing

   Also called magnification

   Jumping to the worst possible outcome and treating it as likely.

   • I made a typo in the email. I'm going to get fired.
   • He's late. Something terrible must have happened.

   Try instead What is the most likely outcome, rather than the worst one?

8. 08

   Emotional reasoning

   Treating a feeling as proof. I feel it, so it must be true.

   • I feel stupid, so I must be stupid.
   • I feel nervous about this flight, so something must be wrong with it.

   Try instead Name the feeling, then check the facts on their own.

   In one study, people with anxiety disorders rated a made up situation as more dangerous when the story said they felt anxious in it. A control group did not. Arntz and colleagues, 1995

9. 09

   Should statements

   Strict rules for yourself or others, full of should, must and ought to.

   • I should be over this by now.
   • He should know what I need without me saying it.

   Try instead Turn should into would like. I would like to feel better soon.

10. 10

    Labeling

    Giving yourself or someone else a name, based on one thing they did.

    • I forgot her birthday. I'm a terrible friend.
    • He cut me off in traffic. What an idiot.

    Try instead Describe what happened, rather than who someone is.

11. 11

    Personalization

    Taking the blame for something that was mostly not up to you.

    • My kid got a bad grade. I'm failing as a parent.
    • The party was quiet. I must have made it awkward.

    Try instead List the other things that played a part.

12. 12

    Blaming

    Putting all of the fault on someone else and none on your own part.

    • I'm always late because my partner talks too much in the morning.
    • We lost the deal because the other team never helps.

    Try instead What part, even a small one, was yours to change?